ONE LESS!!

We humbly invite you to turn your volume WAY up!

Sing with us!

Dance with us!

Cry with us!

Laugh with us!

Today we are celebrating ONE LESS!!

She Will Be Missed

The goodbye's have begun.

Vera will be missed by many here.

Last week we began taking pictures of Vera with her (and our) favorite people at the orphanage. My awesome husband went out yesterday and got the pictures printed and bought frames for them. We started giving them out yesterday afternoon. We gave out more today and I do believe I wasn't the only one with tears in my eyes.

This is Olya. She obviously loves Vera a great deal.

Olya is the (only) one who takes the kids to the playground.

She went with us when Vera had her passport photo taken.

We learned that Olya has taken Vera out before and let her ride the bus.

We haven't seen Olya in several days...I do hope she's there tomorrow to say goodbye.

This is Mama Luda. She's the only person here (besides me) that Vera has called Mama.

Luda works in the baby room and obviously enjoys what she does.

She's one that came outside to calm Vera one day when she was hysterical.

She specifically asked for a copy of this picture.

We haven't seen Ana in a few days either.

I sure hope we get to say goodbye and give her this picture.

She obviously loves Vera lots!

And Alla.

Alla obviously loves Vera too.

She's the one who gently wrapped her arm around Vera that day

when the other caregiver got in Vera's face.

Two of the nurses in the orphanage...

They always seem happy to see us.

Which isn't the case with everyone here.

I'm sad to say I don't know her name, but Vera can tell us.

She is very patient and kind with all the children.

We gave her this picture yesterday and she was very thankful.

This is my favorite nurse.

We gave her this picture today and she said 'spaciba'

countless times and gave us a thumbs up.

She also said, "Klauss." (which means 'cool.')

This is one of the janitor/groundskeepers.

He reminds Jon and I of my dad.

He is always so kind and patient with Vera.

He answers her countless 'Whys' and 'Hows' with a smile no matter how long it takes.

The other day she must have asked him questions for at least 20 minutes.

He would laugh at the funny things she said.

He would show her things she asked about.

Things she's probably wanted to ask and see for years.

She's finally getting answers.

We gave this picture to him today and he put his hand

over his heart and then gave us a thumbs up. He was so appreciative.

She will be missed by many.

So, I will likely be out of commission for a few days. Tomorrow we'll be running around getting all the necessary paperwork and hopefully Vera's passport. Pray we can get her passport tomorrow! After we have the passport, we'll go get Vera and bust her out of the orphanage! Can you believe it? TOMORROW!! We only have to say 'goodbye' to Vera ONE MORE TIME this afternoon. Sasha came to the orphanage today and Vera had more questions. She asked if we have gloves for her yet. We told her we'll get some as soon as we get home and she can pick them out herself. She asked where Kiev is, how long it'll take to get to there and how long we'll be there. She asked if her brothers and sister are waiting for her in Kiev. She asked how long she'll live with us. She told us the menu of foods she would like to eat (potatoes, apples, soup, bananas, and meat). She asked if we will we drive to America or do we have to fly.

Jon and I are just amazed. We are so blessed to be Vera's parents. God hand-picked her for us and we are so thankful. Vera is such a precious, special little girl. Many of you have said how blessed Vera is to get to be part of our family. But the truth is, WE are the blessed ones. I've heard other adoptive parents say that. Now I get it. We are the ones who are blessed. This journey has been pretty amazing. Tomorrow we will FINALLY close this chapter. And the REAL adventure will begin!

I'll update you again as soon as I can. Hopefully we'll have a good internet connection in Kiev! We're packing and working on embassy paperwork today. Tomorrow will be an early, long day. But a day to celebrate!!

Lunch Date

I've been dreading writing this post. But it must be said.

I've come to the ironic conclusion that children do not belong in orphanages.

Duh!

Children belong with families...mommies and daddies and maybe a sibling or two...or three...or four...or sometimes more or sometimes none. But they definitely belong with mommies and daddies. Nannies and caregivers are just that. Nannies and caregivers don't say, "I love you." Nannies and caregivers don't give hugs. They don't comfort when a child is hurt. Most nannies and caregivers (that we've seen) do their best, but when you're responsible for 11 - 15 kids at one time, there's only so much you can do.

Sigh.

I am so thankful for all the time we've been able to spend with Vera here and that we've had a glimpse into her life over the past 6 years. We love this girl DEARLY and she is an Evans for sure. When I stop to ponder how perfect she is for our family...well, it makes me weepy. When I stop to ponder how much you all will adore her...well, it makes tears fall down my cheeks. You will all love her bunches. She has already brought so much joy to Jon and I and I know she will bring even more to our whole family and each of you once we get her home where she belongs. I know I've said it before, but Vera is a treasure. Our treasure. We have 3 amazing kids at home and now we're adding one more to the mix. Why are we so blessed? I'll let you know when I figure it out.

Vera doesn't cry when she's hurt. Have I told you that? She's had a few injuries during our visits...she's been bonked in the eye (and it swelled up a bit) and knocked in the head by a wooden swing. She's fallen countless times...several were 'big' falls and I was prepared for tears. Nope. She has never cried. Her eyes teared up a few of those times, but the tears never fell. She would wipe them away and move on. We have seen how the children in her group are comforted, and I use that word loosely, when they're hurt. It's minimal. Sometimes it's just words across the playground. Sometimes it's by pinching the child's cheeks...like that's what you want if you're hurt. Every now and then a crying child will be placed next to a caregiver. I have yet to see a child hugged or held. I have yet to see a child sit in someone's lap. It's weird to say, but I'm looking forward to Vera's first injury that causes her to cry and seek comfort from Jon or I.

Vera doesn't know how to seek comfort or be comforted.

She doesn't know how to be held, but she's learning.

She doesn't know how to hug or be hugged, but she's learning.

She's 6. She should have hugging down by now.

Sigh.

Children do not belong in orphanages.

I have yet to see a child in Vera's group play with a toy. Her room is FULL of great books and toys. They have been in the exact same positions on the shelves since our first day here. I don't know why, but I took a mental photo that day. Nothing has moved. No toy has been played with. No book has been read. WHY?

Jon and I were commenting a few days ago that the only times we have seen Vera's group actually play is when they're on the little fenced in playground. And they only go to the little playground when a certain caregiver is there. One of Vera's (and ours) favorite people. She was gone for a week. Vera's group was not on the playground that whole, entire week. Do you know what we've seen them do instead of play?

They sit. They walk.

The group comes outside every day if it's not raining. We've seen them sit, for over an hour (sometimes our whole 2 hour visit), with no toys. They just sit in the shade on blankets or on benches. They sit and stare at the world around them. It seems so cruel to me. They're children. They're 2, 3 and 4 year olds. They should be running and squealing and playing tag. The boys should be pretending all the sticks around them are swords. They should be playing with balls and trucks and dolls. They should be smelling all the beautiful flowers around them and eating the ripening cherries off the trees.

Sometimes, instead of sitting, they walk. One day they did 3 slow loops around the grounds. About every 30 minutes, Vera's group would pass us. Vera would be playing in the sand or eating berries off a tree and here would come her group. 12 or so kids ages 2 to 4. Walking in circles. Never veering off the cement path. Never exploring all the awesome trees and flowers on the grounds. Never going down the slide or teeter-tottering or playing in the sand. Never running. I haven't seen any of these children run.

They sit.

And they walk.

One day we picked Vera up from her room and the kids were sitting all lined up in their little wooden chairs watching a soap opera. It may have been in Russian, but a soap opera is a soap opera no matter what country you're in. When we returned Vera over 2 hours later, her group was still sitting there in the same wooden chairs watching TV.

Another day when we arrived for our visit, no one was is in the big room, but we could hear the caregivers' voices. I ventured in and got a peek into the other room, the one I thought was their bedroom. I didn't see any beds, but there were a few little couches. The kids were all sitting on the little couches. Just sitting. The children were not talking...just sitting and staring.

I got to have lunch with Vera on Friday. Well, I got to go into her room during lunch and watch Vera eat with her group.

I cried on the way home.

Children do not belong in orphanages.

They started with borscht and bread.

See the darling one next to Vera with the pony tail on top of her head? That's 'Lisa.' She's the one who wanted me to pick her up when we first met Vera. She's the one who snuggled up next to Jon and patted his arm. She's the one who wraps herself around my legs every chance she gets. She's the one who will be on our hearts and minds when we leave here. I don't know 'Lisa's' story. I don't even know if she's adoptable. But she's the one. Jon and I discussed it and neither of us believe that Lisa is ours...but she is somebody's. Could she be yours?

See the beautiful girl on the right (below)? That's 'Nice Girl.' I don't know her story either, but I do think she's had visitors. One day while we were waiting for Vera (the kids are usually in tank tops and underwear, but sometimes they put a dress on Vera for our visits), I peeked in each and every locker in Vera's group. I wanted to cry. 10 of these children only have hats and shoes. And really, those hats and shoes belong to the orphanage. 10 of these children have nothing. Nothing to call their own. The 3 that had other things in their lockers were Vera (who has had several visitors), 'Allie' who we've seen several times with who we assume is her father, and Nice Girl, who must have had a visitor because she has a purse and a few other things in her locker.
Anyway, lunch was interesting. This (below) was the only time I could get Vera to look at me. I kept trying to talk to her, but she was very intent on her lunch. I think I figured out why. It was eerily quiet. There was no talking except the caregivers telling a little one to be careful (I assume). 13 kids, ages 2 - 4, and not one of them spoke a word during lunch. The only sound was the silverware clanking against the bowls and plates. I've taught pre-school and I remember what lunch with 15 three-year-olds was like. It was not like this.
Lisa and Nice Girl paid me a lot of attention. Aren't they just precious? After the soup bowls were taken away, the children were given plates with potatoes, green onions and another piece of bread. They wasted no time in digging in. Vera was taking such huge bites I kept telling her to slow down or she would choke. The others ate the same way. Quickly and with huge bites that were barely chewed before they swallowed. Vera finished her food and a caregiver started walking towards our table. Nice Girl started shoveling food into her mouth. I didn't realize what was going on until the caregiver reached for Nice Girl's plate. She was almost done and was still shoveling bites in as fast as she could. And away went her plate. Nice Girl wasn't done. She would've finished her food. Her eyes teared up as her plate was taken away with a few bites still on it. She wasn't done. She wanted to finish her lunch. Her mouth was so full from shoveling in those last bites that she could hardly chew.
Obviously these kids aren't starving. I have not seen one child here that looks malnourished in any way. For this, I am so thankful. So many people have told us that this is one of the nicest orphanages in Ukraine. I don't doubt that at all. It was just heartbreaking to watch the caregivers shove HUGE bites of food into little 2 year old mouths who hardly got to chew and swallow before the next huge bite of food was shoved into their mouths. What is the rush?

I don't understand this place. These children do not belong here. Why are they here? Where are their parents? Why have we let the orphan crisis become a crisis? These children need families. These children need to PLAY. These children need someone to hug them every day and tell them they are LOVED. The only sense I can make of their smiles that come so easily is that God watches over and upholds the fatherless.

This past week was hard for me. I cried a lot and had a good ole pity party. Was I crying because I miss my kids at home? ABSOLUTELY! I literally ache to hug my 3 oldest children at home. I knew being away for this long would be hard, but I had no idea it was going to be like this. And really, the first 3 weeks, though long, went pretty quickly. I missed the kids, but not like I have this week. But that's not the only reason for all the tears this week. I have cried for 'Lisa' and Nice Girl and so many other children that we've seen every day. So many other children that call us Mama and Papa. So many other children who need someone to come get them. So many other children living each day without hugs and 'I love you's.' So many children...

Children do not belong in orphanages.

I will leave you with Dueteronomy 10: 12 - 21. This passage has been such a comfort to me as I have sojourned in a land that is not my own.

"And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you, but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the Lord, which I am commanding you today for your good? Behold, to the Lord your God belong heaven and the heaven of heavens, the earth with all that is in it. Yet the Lord set his heart in love on your fathers and chose their offspring after them, you above all peoples, as you are this day. Circumcise therefore the foreskin of your heart, and be no longer stubborn. For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great, the mighty, and the awesome God, who is not partial and takes no bribe. He executes justice for the fatherless and the widow, and loves the sojourner, giving him food and clothing. Love the sojourner, therefore, for you were sojourners in the land of Egypt. You shall fear the Lord your God. You shall serve him and hold fast to him, and by his name you shall swear. He is your praise. He is your God, who has done for you these great and terrifying things that your eyes have seen."

Homecoming

I am totally stealing the letter below from Tesney, but knowing her heart I don't think she'll mind. Now that the news is out that we have a homecoming date, many of you are wondering and asking about the details and if you're invited to the airport. The long and short of it is YES! We want ANYONE and EVERYONE who is willing and able to be there. This 18 month journey has been a LONG one and we would not be here if it were not for all of your love, support, help, encouragement, prayers, donations, etc. But along with that, there are a few things to be aware of. Vera will likely be overwhelmed and exhausted (as will Jon and I) and we will not be introducing her to anyone except the kids and Jon's mom while we're at the airport. What we would like is to have some time with Jacob, Caleb and Abbi first just as a family. (We would love to have one or two people in the background taking pictures and another one or two people video taping...preferably digital video so we can share clips of it here. Let me know if you'd like to volunteer.) We would like all of you, our welcome wagon, to wait patiently in the Delta baggage claim area for us. Have your cameras and hugs ready! We will arrive on Thursday, July 7th at 2:45 pm. Our flight will be coming from Amsterdam. I would love it if someone would take a picture of the screen with our flight saying "Arrived." And please take pictures of the group waiting for Vera's arrival. Coming home is a BIG deal! Atlanta will be our first point of contact in the US, so we'll have to go through customs...who knows how long that will take!

Now...on to the letter!

Dear Family and Friends,

As we get ready to embark on one of the most exciting events in our lives, we are thinking a lot about the people around us and how much our lives are going to change. Family and friends are so very important to us and we cannot wait for Vera to share in the blessing of a relationship with each one of you. We feel that God has worked through you all to give us love, support, and encouragement during our adoption process. You have prayed, cried, and shared in our excitement; truly you have been Christ to us. We appreciate you more than we can ever express in words.

We’re thrilled about bringing Vera home! We’ve done a lot of reading, research, and asked a lot of other adoptive parents about this process and we feel as prepared as we can be to help Vera become a member of our family and community. There are some things about adoptive parenting that are the same as parenting a biological child. There are also quite a few areas that we have learned are different. Through our adoption agency, training, books, other adoptive parents, and more, we have learned that Vera needs a specific type of environment and parenting when she first comes home in order to feel safe and secure and to learn how to live successfully in our family.

While we know that every child is different, we also understand that there are many possible things that will impact Vera’s beliefs and behavior when she gets home. These include how much nurturing Vera received, if there was abuse or neglect, the amount and quality of the food she received, illnesses, the quality of care and her unique temperament and personality. The result of these variables can include behavioral issues, emotional disorders and a sense of grief and loss from being separated from the only home and caregivers Vera has ever known. Adoption is a traumatic and scary event for a child, whether they are newborn or 10 years old. Vera is being removed from all of her routines and familiar surroundings. If you have children, you can imagine plucking them out of your family and into a totally different home in a different country. Anyone would feel grief and sadness at an event like this. So in order to help Vera feel safe and learn that we are her parents, we will be creating the type of environment that will help promote security for her during this stressful time.

When Vera gets home, at the recommendation of the experienced adoption professionals from whom we have been learning, we need to implement specific parenting approaches to help encourage a strong, attached, emotionally healthy bond. Vera needs to learn that WE are her parents. She needs to feel nurtured and safe. She will not be used to having parents to love and care for her.

Here are some things we will be doing for Vera based on research and experience with other adopted children. We will be living a very quiet life with limited trips out and few visitors in for a little while. Social workers and psychologists tell us that when children are first brought into the adoptive home, they often feel overwhelmed, scared, and nervous. By keeping our lives very boring at first, we will be helping Vera feel safe. This does NOT mean we don't want visitors coming to meet Vera for the first time. We will just have to limit it a little so that it is not overwhelming. Please feel free to call us and ask to come visit! We just want you to understand that if we have to limit visitors it is not because we want you to stay away. On the contrary, we need your support and encouragement during this time!

I know a number of people are planning to meet us at the airport when we arrive home. That will be WONDERFUL and touching for us to see so many familiar and supportive faces when we arrive. We certainly don't want family and friends to stay away from us, but at the same time we can’t pass Vera around to everyone and we will have to be mindful of overloading her with new things and people. We know you will want to hug, kiss, and help spoil Vera, but it is recommended that we be the only ones to do that at first to improve her chances of attaching strongly to us. Until we feel that Vera has attached and clearly knows that we are her parents, we will need to take care of ALL of her needs. We know that it may feel disappointing to some of you because you have shared in our excitement of bringing Vera home.

As strange as it may seem, adopted children who act very outgoing and affectionate with strangers is not a healthy thing. It is called “indiscriminate affection” and can mean that they haven’t really attached to anyone. It would not be a good sign that Vera is attached to us if during her first months home she will let just anyone take her without searching for us. For certain, it going to be a weird and wonderful experience for us. We are so excited and we can’t wait to bring Vera home so you can all see her and get to know her. Things are just a little different when you are adopting a child rather than having a biological child. She will be adapting to a lot of new things…new parents, new brothers, new sister, new home, new foods, new time zone (totally opposite of everything she is used to). That’s a lot to swallow at one time. Although we cannot predict how long it will take Vera to adjust to our home, we feel confident that by implementing some specific parenting approaches it will happen more quickly than if we did not implement those approaches.

To all the wonderful women in my life, it's important that you know Vera has had only women take care of her all of her life. It's quite possible that she doesn't think of me any differently than she does any of her past caregivers. She has no idea what a mommy is or does. I will need to be very careful in the time that Vera spends with you, especially when first meeting. She may very well be "mommy shopping" and I'll have to keep a close eye on how she relates to you, my best of friends. If Vera calls you Mama or Mommy just point in her my direction and reaffirm to her that I am her mommy. If she asks you for something - anything at all - tell her mommy will get it for her. It's very important that she acknowledge and accept that her mommy (and daddy) are the sole source of having her needs met.

We appreciate your time and understanding in reading this. We are giving you this letter because you are very important to us, and we know you will be to Vera as well. We want you to understand how dedicated and committed we are to helping Vera adjust and adapt as smoothly as possible during this stressful time in her life. We feel confident that everything will smooth out quickly and we will be on a more normal schedule! Thank you again for your continued prayers, love, and encouragement.

Much love to you all,

Jon & Amy

A New Day

First of all, thank you to all of you who sent encouraging notes and scripture yesterday. Do you ever have one of those days when you're just done? That was me yesterday. I'm done. I'm done with Ukraine. I'm done with this process. I'm done with the orphanage. I'm done being away from my home kids. I'm done with the buses. I'm done with the hard bed. I'm done with the water that's either scalding hot or freezing cold...there's nothing in between here. I was on the verge of tears most of the day yesterday. I was just done.

But your notes were incredibly encouraging to me. We ended the night Skyping with the kids and Jon's mom and we laughed A LOT! I needed that. But I SO wanted to reach through the screen and hug my babies. Yes, Jacob, you may be taller than me now, but you will always be my baby. Anyway, your messages and prayers meant the world to me yesterday! Spaciba!!

And of course, His mercies are new EVERY morning! Today we had just gotten off the bus and were walking the rest of the way to Vera's orphanage. Our phone rang and it was Sasha asking if we're coming today. I told her we were almost there, and she asked if we would like to go along with her and Vera to get Vera's passport picture taken. Would we?! We hurried our steps a bit.

We arrived and Sasha went to ask permission to take Vera out. She told us that when she arrived and we were not with her, Vera started to cry. Poor baby. We didn't leave on a very good note yesterday...Vera wouldn't even look at us or say 'paka.' I wonder if she thought her cold shoulder made us change our minds. She was all smiles when we got there though. The director said that one of Vera's caregivers had to go with us since Vera is not legally ours yet. No problem. We all piled into Sasha's 'machina' (car) and off we went!

Vera was very quiet and seemed unsure at first...

but she was soon jibber-jabbering away asking Sasha for a drink of Coke.

To which we all said, "Nyet!" The last thing this girl needs is caffeine!

The photo place was pretty small, so I took Vera's picture from a distance

as she stood there and smiled.

Didn't they turn out great?!

Vera's 'do' today...I hope she's not expecting me to do this!

We arrived back at the orphanage and finished our visit. Sasha was with us for a few minutes and we were asking about foods that Vera likes and dislikes. She does NOT like any kind of hot cereal...that's my girl! And she LOVES ice cream. Definitely Jon's girl! She likes most other things. She asked me what I don't like and I told her 'fish.' Then, of all things, she asked me if I like pie. "No." Then she said maybe I don't like it because I haven't tried it. I assured her I've tried it and she suggested I try it here. :)

You just gotta love this girl!

Right before it was time to take Vera back to her group, she had leaned over me and was laying across my lap and into Jon's. I was rubbing her back and Jon was stroking her face. It was a lovely moment. I said, "Vera, you're so calm today," and she shot up and gave me a look. Next time she's calm, I'll just think it to myself. She didn't fuss at all about going back to her group. And we each got voluntary hugs and kisses 'paka.'

Sasha left to go review our court decree and make sure there were no errors. Then she was heading somewhere to get Vera's passport started. She called us this afternoon to tell us that Vera's passport will only take 1 day to get (it could've been as many as 4 days) and that we'll be able to get Vera next Wednesday and leave Nikolaiv that day!! This was EXCELLENT news and I needed to hear it! The sooner we head back to Kiev, the sooner we can accomplish all the embassy appointments and get the heck out of here! Sasha is arranging a driver for us so we don't have to take Vera on the overnight train. She agreed that would be better for Vera.

Once I know our homecoming date, I will let you all know. Sasha told us the other day that it was too soon and she will let us know when we can make our arrangements. It cannot be soon enough! Vera so obviously belongs with us and we're just ready to get her home with the rest of her family!

Not Much to Report

Not much to report today, but I've gotta give you something, right? It's been pretty quiet around here. Which is a good thing when you think about it. We met Vera two weeks ago yesterday. Can you believe it?! Two weeks! We have come so far in just two weeks.

Our visits are pretty much the same thing these days. We get Vera, head outside, she unzips my backpack to find the snack we brought and says, "Please" and we enjoy a snack together. Then we play. The sandbox is still her favorite place.

But we do enjoy the slide and teeter totter a bit more.

And we decided to give the bubbles another try.

So far, so good.

We also eat a lot of blackberries and cherries right off the trees.

Vera LOVES to be messy and filthy.

As hard as we try, we never bring her back clean.

Jon and I decided to try ignoring Vera the next time she eats sand or dumps it on her hair. It seems to happen right before it's time to take her back to her group. Yesterday, sure enough, we told Vera it was time for groupa and she got a big handful of sand and put it in her mouth. Jon and I walked away to gather our things. We looked back at her and she was watching us. She dumped some sand on her head and we kept going. She yelled for us, got up and came toward us. It worked!! We got to try it again today. Lucky us.

Vera is accepting the word 'no' from us much more easily and with much less of a fight than before. The only time she has a real fit now is when it's time for us to leave. She had another total breakdown yesterday when we brought her back. Crying, sobbing, shaking her head saying, "No groupa. No groupa." It's so heartbreaking. She doesn't do this every time, but it's so hard to watch and listen to.

If she doesn't have a breakdown, she stalls. Vera is a master at stalling. She'll do whatever she can think of to delay us bringing her back to her group. She wants one more berry. She wants to dump one more cupful of sand. She's a mess and needs to wash her hands. She has trash to throw away. She falls. She sits. She goes limp when we take her hands to stand her up. Once we get her in the building, she has to talk to anyone and everyone she sees. She keeps the conversation going until they finally say, "Go with Mama and Papa. Paka." She wants Jon to lift her up. She takes a five second break in between each step up to her room. She has to investigate the strollers and carts in the hallway. You name it, she uses it to stall.

Sometimes she just blows us a kiss 'paka' and other times we get hugs and kisses. Today we got HUGE, LONG hugs goodbye with lots of neck kissing (from us) and giggling (from Vera). I told her THIS is a stall tactic I really enjoy!

Today we had lunch with the Kruliks and the Housers.

It was wonderful!!

The Housers are hoping to have court this week, so keep them in your prayers.

And Kevin leaves tomorrow to head home, leaving Missy here on her own.

I'm sure she would appreciate your prayers as well.

As far as we're concerned, we really want to come home.

The 10 day wait is about to drive me insane.

We miss Jacob, Caleb and Abbi terribly.

Skype is great, but it's just not doing it for me anymore.

I miss my friends. I miss our church. I miss my bed and pillow. I miss fresh, clean towels straight from the dryer. I miss my faucets with normal temperature controls. I miss my van. I miss guacamole. I miss real coffee.

8 more days, friends.

Vera is ours a week from tomorrow.

Please pray that the time flies and also

that we won't take our time here for granted.

Pray that our bond with Vera continues to grow.

Outdoor Fun

Our afternoon visit with Vera on Saturday was pretty quiet. (Our morning visit was quiet too...we didn't even take any pictures.) We played in the sand for awhile and Vera enjoyed making little sand mounds with the cup we brought.

This kept her busy for awhile.

Saturday was also the first time she would get on anything that required her feet to be off the ground. I think this might have been a trust issue. The first time Jon picked her up, Vera's body was stiff as a board. I wish I had taken a picture of it to compare the difference now. Now when Jon picks her up, she is mostly relaxed. But it's very obvious that she hadn't been picked up or held in a long time. It did not come naturally to her.

Jon and Vera enjoyed the teeter totter for several minutes...

And then we moved on to the swings. We've been trying to get her to swing since the beginning. She was always happy to push us on the swings but would not get on one herself. I was thinking she just feels more secure with both feet on the ground, but now I'm wondering if she just didn't trust what we would do.

These swings are the most awkward, uncomfortable things ever,

but it was so fun to see Vera enjoying herself on one.

There was a shy, quiet boy swinging next to Vera

with one of the ladies from the ministry group.

I hadn't slept well the previous 3 nights and after our visit Saturday I was completely wiped out. I just wanted a good meal and a bed (my bed). We took the bus and headed to a restaurant that the Housers had told us about. English menus are hard to come by here. And if there are no pictures, forget it! We sat down and got our drinks and then the Housers came walking down the street. We ate dinner with them and enjoyed getting to know them better. They live in Alabama, so not too far from us. I am so thankful to God for bringing the Kruliks and Housers here at the same time as us. It's very cool and such a God thing that we have all hit it off so easily and effortlessly. It's so wonderful to share this experience and get to fellowship together. Kim and I were both pretty exhausted, otherwise I'm sure one of us would have thought to take a picture. Oh well. Next time, I guess.

And in case you're wondering, I slept GREAT Saturday night. We decided to skip our morning visit yesterday and I got to sleep in. I needed that!

A Hard Goodbye

Our visit Friday morning began with a banana. She practically inhaled it.

Then she took a bite of the banana peel. The little stinker.

What IS it with her and putting things in her mouth?

I honestly think she was relieved when we took the peel away from her.

She put up a minimal fight, but didn't argue about it.

The Housers were on the same playground with us and when they left,

they had left this punching balloon.

So what were we to do?

And then Vera dug out my chapstick and mirror...

and this kept her busy for quite some time.

She would put chapstick on herself, then me, then Jon.

Notice that whoever she was putting chapstick on had to hold the mirror.

Vera would position it just so in our hands.

Then she had to brush my hair.

We really need to work on the word 'gentle.'

I'm very thankful I still have some hair left after that. :)

And then it was back to the phone.

Our visit was soon over and we told Vera it was time for groupa. She knows what this means by now. While Jon was gathering our things, I followed Vera who had taken off towards the door. We knew that her group was still outside and I was leading her to where they were. On our way there, she started to cry and whine. "No groupa. No groupa." I told her I didn't want to take her back but I had to. We rounded the corner and saw that her group was walking towards us. Poor little Vera completely lost it and dropped to the ground. She was screaming, "No groupa! No groupa!" and shaking her head. I would try to pick her up and she would flail around. She's very strong. Then she started sobbing. We hadn't seen her sob until then. Oh, break my heart. I was fighting back tears. If I could have, I would have snatched her up and run out of there. One of the caregivers (one who is not our favorite...she never smiles and she doesn't seem to enjoy the children) made her way to us and was obviously out of patience. To give her a little credit, it was very hot outside and she was walking with 6 little ones. When she let go of their hands to deal with Vera, they scattered. 2 of them wrapped themselves around my legs while another 2 kept trying to take my camera. While I was trying to comfort Vera who was crumpled up on the ground sobbing. The caregiver grabbed Vera by the chin (not very gently) and got right in her face. If I knew how to say it eloquently in Russian I would've said, "Hey! Hands off my girl!" But I was helpless. Vera was still crying and yelling "No groupa! No groupa!" Finally, Alla, one of the nice caregivers (she had a big stroller with 5 children in it) came over. She put her arm around Vera and very gently talked to her. It took a few minutes but Vera calmed down. Alla told her to say goodbye to Mama. Apparently she thought it best to say goodbye there instead of have us bring Vera up to the room. Jon missed this whole thing. It had taken him a few minutes to gather our things and he hadn't seen where we had gone. He thought we had gone to Vera's room. He found us just as we were saying goodbye.

Sasha told us that the goodbyes would get harder from here on out. I wonder if part of Vera's problem on Friday was that she knew she wouldn't see us that afternoon because we had court. She didn't meltdown like that yesterday for either of our goodbyes. I guess some things will remain a mystery.

Christmas in June

Do you ever wake up in the morning and just KNOW it's going to be a wonderful day full of joy and blessings? You feel the anticipation like it's Christmas and you wonder what the 'big' gift is going to be? Well, that's how I felt when I woke up on Thursday. We had been praying that our Interpol clearance would arrive so that we could have court on Friday. Court had already been postponed once. We were SO hoping it would not be delayed again. We want to come home. Jon's mom will need to head home to care for our nephews and we are PRAYING that we'll be home before she needs to leave. If court was postponed again, that hope would pretty much disappear.

I was getting ready for our morning visit with Vera when our phone rang. It was Missy wanting to arrange a lunch get together. Oh my...I can't even tell you how much that thrilled me! Really. It honestly seems like we've known them for years and we are so blessed to be here with them. I love how adoption seems to instantly bond people for life. I was SO thankful for this gift of getting to have lunch, not only with other Americans, but with a WOMAN! We left the apartment and I was on cloud nine. I knew our visit with Vera was going to be great and it mostly was.

When we arrived at the baby home on Thursday, Vera's group was already outside. Have I told you that she doesn't cry when we arrive anymore? She hasn't done that in over a week. No matter where her group is or what they're doing. She smiles and happily leaves her group and leads us elsewhere. Another gift from God.

Vera led us over to where these little concrete boat things are and we sat down and had our snack. I don't think she's ever been allowed to climb on these. While we were here, the Housers came walking over. They were at the baby home meeting their little one for the very first time. I knew they were there because we had seen the inspector and the director together go into an office. I told Jon, "That's gotta be the Housers in there!" Oh, more excitement. An American family HERE at Vera's orphanage! We just waved a hello, but I'm sure we'll be talking more with them in the very near future.

Vera loves to pick any kind of fruit and eat it, whether it's ripe or not. I think we've stopped her from eating these small, green peach looking things, but she still loves to pick them and smell them. She smells EVERYTHING! We wonder if it's because she can't see well. But everything in her hands goes right to her nose...food, leaves, wipes, books, paper, toys. Everything.
There are lots and lots of cherry trees here. Most of the cherries are red, but they are sour, sour, sour. Still Vera loves to eat them. She even knows to spit the seed out.
When it was finally time to head upstairs, Vera came mostly willingly. We got to her door and it was locked. No problem. No panic. No tears. We just hung out there until her group came. We knew they'd be coming in for lunch any minute. So Vera got the brush and did my hair.
We left the orphanage and had a delightful lunch with the Kruliks. Have I told you how much I enjoy spending time with them? When we spoke after our morning visit to confirm where to meet for lunch, Missy told me that their clearance had come. She asked if I had spoken with Sasha yet and I hadn't. Missy said no more and I was thinking, "Oh, she already knows that our clearance didn't come and she doesn't want to tell me." But when we got to the restaurant, she told me that our clearance DID arrive. Praise the Lord!

Sasha was with us for most of our afternoon visit on Thursday. We left Vera to her own devices (picking and eating who knows how many sour cherries) while Sasha prepped us for court. Then Vera came over and asked Sasha a question...I can't remember what it was but it had to do with home. We got out the photo album and went through every picture. Vera had many, many questions that she hasn't been able to ask Jon and I. Well, she can ask but we don't understand. So, Vera's questions included...

Will we let her play outside? Will we let her bathe herself and wash her own hair? We got to the pictures of the school room and Vera asked what's outside the door. So we flipped to the picture of the boys bathroom and it was right next to the picture of Abbi's bathroom. (Soon to be Abbi AND Vera's bathroom.) She saw the cabinet above the toilet and wanted to know what's inside. I told her hairbrushes and hair things (like rubberbands). She asked if the hair things are for her. And she was very happy when I replied positively. With a great big smile the Princess asked if there are also bracelets and necklaces in there for her. :) Vera had many questions about her bedroom. Toby (the dog) is in a few of the pictures of her room and she wanted to make sure that the dog has his own room and she's not sharing her room with him. So funny! She saw the dollhouse in her room and asked if there are dolls to go with it. She asked how to open the doors on the dollhouse. She also asked if there are hair accessories in the dollhouse for her. :) She was very excited about the books in her room. She's an Evans alright! She asked what's in her dresser. She asked what's in her closet. I answered all of these questions and then Vera asked about gloves. Do we have winter gloves for her? We told her 'no' but when winter comes, we'll get some for her. Her response..."How can I play in the snow without gloves?" You just gotta love this girl. Then she was concerned about a winter coat. Again, we assured her that when winter arrives, she will have everything she needs. Then she was concerned about Jacob, Caleb and Abbi not having winter coats. But she kept going back to the gloves. Why don't we have gloves for her? (Sasha told us that Vera was being harder on us than the judge would be.) Vera wanted to know what shoes she'll wear when she leaves the orphanage. She wanted to know if Jacob, Caleb and Abbi will try to take her things. She's worried that the kids won't love her. We told her they love her SO MUCH already and are so excited to meet her. Then she asked what they will buy for her. We got to the bedroom pictures and Vera pointed to Abbi's room and said, "I want to sleep in there!" Sasha explained our bedroom and Vera said, "You mean they want to sleep TOGETHER?!" Vera is always very concerned about Caleb's glasses in the photos. She asked if Jacob has lost all of his teeth. She was looking at his picture and pointed to his watch (what is it with her and watches?). She kissed Jacob's picture and said she loves him already and when she meets him she will kiss him on both cheeks. She also asked HOW Jacob, Caleb and Abbi are her brothers and sister. A very good question. How do you explain it to a 6 year old?

We also learned that Vera wants to be a teacher and work with children. She would not have the opportunity to fulfill this dream if she stayed here. If Jon and I were not here, Vera would most likely be in an adult mental institution already, where she would literally do nothing all day, every day. She has no future here. I worry about taking her to Kiev. I've read stories of families who were there recently finishing up their paperwork at the embassy and the responses they get from locals about adopting disabled kids. "Why don't you take two healthy children and leave this one here to die?" That's pretty much the attitude here. I worry that people will be impatient with Vera's slow walking and I hope that she'll compliantly sit in the stroller.

Anyway, Vera was finally out of questions. And with that, she closed the album and declared, "Okay. I'm ready to go on the plane now. I'm ready to go home." And that was our big gift of the day! A HUGE answer to prayer! I'm sure it will still be beyond difficult for her to leave the only home she's ever known. But we are very thankful for all the time we've been able to spend with her and that she is beginning to trust us. Please continue to pray that God would be preparing her to leave the orphanage and come with us. Pray that her heart and mind are at peace. Pray that Vera continues to look forward to coming home with us. Sasha was SO encouraged to hear Vera asking these questions and accepting the answers with smiles and nods.

Then it was time to take Vera to her group. Jon was swinging her up and around in the hallway and Vera called to me to watch. It was the third time that she has sought me out to see what she's doing. My heart melts a little every time I hear her call me Mama. It's hard to believe it's been less than two weeks since we met her. It's so obvious that she belongs with us. I miss her when she's not with us. I think I hear her voice when we go places. It's probably hard for some of you to understand this, but I love Vera as much as if I gave birth to her. There's no doubt that she's my daughter. We are so thankful for Vera and that OUR family gets to keep her!