Mine

Whatever is under the whole heaven is Mine.

Job 41:11

If I never hear the word 'Mine' again, it will be too soon. Vera doesn't ask if EVERY SINGLE THING in the house is hers multiple times a day anymore, but it does still come up daily. "Is this mine?" She asks the question about things that she's asked about at least a hundred times. Does she think the answer is going to change? A few weeks ago she asked me if the videos are hers. I told her for the 192nd time that no, the movies are for everyone, but that she could watch them if she wanted to. That led to her removing a whole shelf of movies and dumping them on the floor as she screamed, "MINE! MINE!". Which led to a consequence which led to a tantrum which escalated to a rage.

Sigh.

Mine. The worst 4 letter word in the dictionary if you ask me.

I know all kids go through the 'mine' stage. But with Vera it is so intense.

We got our Christmas tree up this week. Finally! Last year when we put all our Christmas things away, I filled a box of ornaments for Leanna so that when we got our things out this year she would feel included. One of the ornaments has a baby picture of her. Another one has a photo of her from last summer when she was here. Another is a pretty, sparkly "L." We needed new stockings anyway, so one day after Christmas Abbi and I set out shopping and found 6 new stockings for our family.

The other day I was marveling at how God worked this for good.

As soon as the boxes of ornaments came out Vera started asking where hers were. She didn't want to know IF there were any for her. She wanted to know which ones were hers. Sometimes I wonder what she's thinking. She'll look at our family picture in the living room (which we really need to update!) and ask why she's not in it. She'll take out photo albums and ask where she is. Why doesn't she have a baby album like the older 3 kids? We went to Illinois last week for Thanksgiving and we drove by the apartment we lived in when Jacob was born. We were pointing things out to him and from the back we hear Vera ask, "Why not me?" As in, why wasn't she there too? So, what is she thinking? Does she think I gave birth to her, dropped her off in a Ukrainian baby house and came back 6 years later to bring her home? I wish I knew.

Anyway, the way God prompted me last year to have ornaments and a stocking ready for this year just amazes me. I removed the ornaments with photos of Leanna and gave the box to Vera. She looked at me and asked, 'these mine?' Oh, she was thrilled to have her own box of ornaments to help decorate the tree. And decorate she did.

My Christmas elves.

This last photo was taken shortly after a tantrum. After we finished the tree, Vera was trying to find one of her ornaments. Do you see how big the tree is? Do you have any idea how many ornaments we have? I told Vera I had no idea where this one particular ornament was but that it was okay because I didn't know where all of mine were either. And Jacob didn't know where all of his were and Caleb didn't know where all of his were, etc., etc. But I DO know that they are all on the tree somewhere. Well, that wasn't good enough and Vera started to cry. So the big kids were taking ornaments off asking Vera, "Is this the one you're looking for?" No. No. No. More crying. I pulled Vera onto my lap and tried to tell her that it really didn't matter where her ornaments were. They were all on the tree and they would stay on the tree until after Christmas and then we'd take them all off and wrap them all back up and put them back in the boxes until next Christmas.

Well, that did it.

She started screaming, "MINE! MINE!" She wanted to take her ornaments off the tree and put them in her room. I repeated the above, that all the ornaments would stay on the tree until after Christmas and then they would all get put away. I told her we keep them all together so that none of them get lost.

She wouldn't have it. The crying and screaming continued.

I gave Vera the choice of calming down and staying in the living room with the family or going to her room by herself if she was going to keep crying. It was almost 7 and I hadn't even started dinner yet. She got up and walked to her room, screaming the whole way. Sometimes she just needs a few minutes alone to pull herself together. I was hoping this was one of those times. When Vera came out of her room a few minutes later, we took this photo.
The other day something hit me. It was one of those "DUH" moments and I couldn't believe I hadn't put it together before now. I have several pictures of Vera at her orphanage opening gifts. On at least 3 different occasions. I never saw one of those gifts when we were there. We didn't even come home with the gifts we gave to Vera the first day we met her. A few of the things were Abbi's and had sentimental value. I was looking forward to having pictures of Abbi AND Vera playing with a few of these things. I will never have those photos. I know it's not that big of a deal and I should get over it. I'm trying, but I'm still a bit bitter about it. We brought those things to Vera because we wanted her to have them. Where did they go? We know they were in her locker the day before we busted her out. But when we cleaned out her locker the next day, the things we had brought her were gone. I didn't realize it at the time or I would've asked. It was such an emotional, roller-coaster-of-a-day the last thing I was thinking about was what was coming out of Vera's locker.

Anyway, what about the other gifts that I have photos of Vera opening? Where did they go? Why weren't they in her locker? NO WONDER she has issues with 'mine.' Everything that was ever given to her was taken away! We've been home almost 5 months and I'm still not over coming home without the gifts we gave to Vera. How much harder is it for a 6 year old to get over having her gifts taken away? Perhaps my new understanding will give me an extra dose of patience the next time 'mine' comes up.

Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding.

Proverbs 3:13

Gingerbread Houses

We had a super-fun afternoon yesterday! Ever since we moved here 5 years ago, one of our favorite Christmas traditions has been getting together with our homeschool co-op and making gingerbread houses. This is one of those activities that we all look forward to each year. We actually switched co-ops this year and this wasn't a tradition of our new co-op. But a few of our awesome moms decided to host the event for us...I was so glad! It's much more fun to do this with a group of friends!First, the kids set to work creating a Winter Wonderland. I had covered one of my cookie sheets with foil and they used white icing to cover the whole thing. This year, instead of making a gingerbread house, the kids wanted to make a mini village. So instead of decorating one big house, they had 5 little buildings instead. I must admit, it was pretty darn cute! Now, before you go thinking I made the gingerbread...I did not. This all came from a handy little kit from Wal-Mart. All we had to do was assemble the pieces and decorate them. We assembled everything as soon as we got up (in hindsight, I really should've had my coffee first) as it had to set for 3 hours before decorating.

As you can see, much thought and work went into each little structure...

Ta-Da!

Their little village turned out so stinkin' cute!

Above - Abbi and Bethany

Below - Jacob, Elliott, CalebWe're so thankful for friends!

Thank you Tisha, Mitzi, Kathy and everyone else who helped organize this fun afternoon for us!

Operation Christmas Child

Miscellaneous toys, games, puzzles, Legos, art supplies, hygiene items, etc...$75

(over half of which was the kids own money)Donation to ship and track 3 shoeboxes full of goodies overseas... $21

The joy of preparing and filling shoeboxes with presents to send to kids who would otherwise not receive anything this Christmas...

Priceless!

Our super-fantastic little church donated 41 boxes!

O Christmas Tree - Part 2

I am so sorry for the delay...I know you've been on the edge of your seat waiting for Part Two of the putting-up-of-the-Evans-Christmas-tree saga. Here you go...if you haven't read Part One yet, you simply must. You just won't appreciate Part Two without first reading Part One.

Oh, happy day! Thursday was the 'put up the Christmas tree' day in the Evans' home and what a happy day it was! Aside from the, "Mommy, is it time to put up the tree yet?" about every 4 minutes from one of the kids, it was a pretty peaceful event. The tree was still heavy and awkward, and we still had to spend some time shaping the branches to make it look pretty. But how glorious it was to put it up, plug in the lights (that I didn't have to string myself) and VOILA! It was done! And the best part...IT'S IN THE LIVING ROOM!! Oh, it is just so pretty. I am so pleased. My mood was even good enough that I got out the camera...

Now, when it was time to put the angel on the top of the tree, we hit a little snag. Our beautiful angel would not stay on. She kept falling (headfirst) forward or sideways or backwards. Apparently our old tree had a much longer branch on the top and the angel always balanced properly. Our new tree has a shorter top branch making our angel a little top-heavy. Interestingly, we spent all week last week learning about balance and center of gravity in Science. So, like any good homeschooling mom would do, I turned this into a lesson (my mood was even patient enough to do this). The problem - our angel's center of gravity was too high, causing her to fall over. The solution - we must lower her center of gravity. How? Any ideas? Caleb's idea was to tape some rocks to the bottom of the angel. Her upper body is ceramic and her underside is just a sheet of plastic rolled into a cone shape. Her lovely dress hides this plastic cone. So Caleb thought we should just duct tape some rocks to the plastic cone. I guess it's true that men will use duct tape to fix anything! This would work, I told him, but what else could we do? Any other ideas? Jacob's brain was obviously still fried from school that day. He had a long week with Pre-Algebra (which means I did too), and his expression was completely blank. Abbi's idea was to remove the plastic cone from under the angel's dress altogether. What we did instead (after discussing the role the plastic cone played in the angel's center of gravity) was to cut about 3 inches off the plastic cone. This brought her center of gravity lower, and much to the kids' skepticism when I told them this should work, she stayed on top of the tree! YAY! But, of course, I'm too short (even standing on the top step of the ladder...the one that says Do Not Stand On Or Above This Step - YOU CAN LOSE YOUR BALANCE) to get the angel on our new, 9 ft. tree. So, it was Daddy to the rescue!

Our cat, Phoebe, had great fun while we put up the tree. Normally, this would've been a nuisance and I would've locked her in my room to keep her out of everything. Not this year! This year it was so cute how she snuggled right in underneath the tree. And how she thought she was little enough to fit in one of the boxes. Um, Phoebe, your rear end is sticking out. That is so unbecoming on a lady!
Toby was just content to be in the middle of everything as he gnawed on his bone.

The boys were obviously the first to get to the ornaments box. These were the first two ornaments to grace our new tree.

These are two of my favorite ornaments. The glass nativity above always goes front and center on the tree. I love to look at it and be reminded of the reason for Christmas!

The ornament below always goes somewhere near the nativity ornament shown above. It's another one that I like to have front and center where it can always be seen. This photo of the kids (taken in 2000) always makes me smile no matter how often I look at it.

The ornament below is another family favorite. We watch The Christmas Story at least once every Christmas season...it's a classic! I admit that before meeting Jon I hadn't even heard of this movie, let alone seen it. He was appalled, on our first Christmas together, that I had no idea what the movie was even about! And now, 14 Christmases later, it's a family tradition.

And this is the ornament Abbi couldn't wait to find!

And now...the moment you've been waiting for...

The unveiling of the 2009 Evans Christmas tree!

TA DA!

O Christmas Tree - Part One

Oh happy day, happy day! We FINALLY purchased a new, artificial Christmas tree last weekend. YAY! You may be wondering why I am so excited about our new addition...let me tell you. The tree we had (which is now sitting in the garage waiting for a new home...like the dump!) was fondly referred to as the 'Charlie Brown Christmas tree' for the past SEVERAL years. Yes, several years. Jon has been promising me a new tree for at least 3 years, but like good (cheap...I mean frugal) stewards of our money, we tried to wait until after Christmas to get a really good deal. Well, the past two Christmases have been spent in Illinois and there was no point in going out the day after Christmas to find a great deal when there wouldn't be room in the van to bring it home. And by the time we got home from Illinois, all the trees left in the stores were...worse than the sad little tree we already had at home.

So, this was the year. Two weeks ago, the kids and I had to make a trip to Hobby Lobby (did you hear the boys groan?) when what to my wondering eyes should appear? A half price sale on Christmas trees...and yes, I did cheer! WOO HOO! But of course, this was on a Saturday...the last day of the sale...and it was already late...and Jon was busy moving his office into our bedroom...and by the time I got home, I realized it was not to be. But then, last Saturday I saw the Hobby Lobby ad and what do you know?! The trees were again on sale half-price. So we took the back seat out of the van and headed off to find the perfect tree! My only requests were that the tree be at least 9 ft. tall and it HAD to be pre-lit...this was a must! Our old tree was 7.5 ft. and was fine in our house in Texas, but when we moved here 5 years ago, I realized how pathetic our little tree looked amongst very high vaulted ceilings in the living room. So, for the past 5 years, I've settled with the tree in the dining room where the ceilings aren't so high (and it doesn't look so ridiculous) and that way, it sat in front of one of our front windows. So whenever we came home in the dark, we'd see our little lit-up tree...the closest thing to outside lights the kids would ever see on our home. I say I've 'settled' the past few years because I LOVE having the Christmas tree in the living room where I can admire it. I couldn't admire it when it sat in the dining room. Well, not from the couch anyway. Not to mention I like to be in front of the tree to open gifts...which meant we had to sit in the dining room to open gifts in front of the tree. It just didn't feel right.

Fast forward...yesterday was the day we put up the new tree. We normally put up the tree the day after Thanksgiving, but we're heading to Illinois for the holiday and we won't be home that day. So, I decided to put it up before we leave. Now, normally putting up the tree is not exactly an enjoyable experience. First, I would have to drag the heavy box upstairs while shoving the dog out of the way step by step. Then, I would get the tree up and start on the lights. The twins would unravel the strands for me and plug them in to make sure they worked. Inevitably several strands would be dead and after replacing fuses to no avail, I'd have to quit working to make a run to the store for more lights. I'd get home and continue on the lights. The kids would be taking out all the ornaments while I worked on the lights. So, while I'm neck deep in the tree (getting all scraped up) (and getting more frustrated by the moment because most of the branches in the middle were broken and I had to use the string of lights to rig it up) the kids are each coming to me saying, "Mommy, look! It's my such & such ornament!" or "Mommy, when did we get this one?" or "Mommy, this one is broken. Should I throw it away?" or "Mommy, here's the one I made in pre-school!" or (my favorite), "Mommy, here's the one YOU made in pre-school!" Yes, I still have an ornament that I made in pre-school. It's in pretty bad shape, but I still remember making this ornament and how beautiful it was. Obviously, some of the noodles have not survived the years, but this ornament was a masterpiece in its time. Really. Margaret, I don't know if you read my blog, but if you do, do you remember these? If I remember correctly, we made these the same day that Wild Willy got into the purple paint (or maybe it was blue) and painted his hair with it. This makes me wonder...did Willy's mom know his nickname was Wild Willy? And let me say, the nickname was MORE than appropriate for him. But I would just be mortified if my kids had nicknames like Crazy Caleb or Awful Abbi or Jerky Jacob.

Anyway, while the kids are coming to me with their excited comments, I'm thinking to myself, "Can't you see I'm busy trying to put this ridiculous tree together?! I've seen those ornaments before. I see them every year! Where is Jon? Why isn't he helping me? Doesn't he know this is the HUSBAND's job? I give up. No Christmas tree this year. It's not worth the hassle. Seriously." But what comes out is something like, "(exasperated sigh) I'll look when I'm done. I'm TRYING to get the lights on." While I'm thinking, 'Can't you see that I'm busy and frustrated and need some peace and quiet?' THEN, after I've successfully put all the lights on and rigged up the broken branches so they'll stay in place and I'm ready to give myself a high-five, I turn around to find...the kids have all the ornaments out...and they have NOT put all the plastic and tissue back in the boxes like I ask them to do EVERY YEAR. I am one of those people who keep the boxes each ornament comes in and I write the year it was received and from whom. This makes organization so simple. But when the kids don't put the plastic and tissue back in the appropriate box...it's utter chaos. So THEN we (I) have to spend some time finding the plastic for this box and the box for this plastic, all the while explaining to the kids (again) that if they had done this one little step as they went, we could be decorating the tree by now.

After all this, I hope you can understand why I haven't taken pictures of us decorating the tree since...2001. It's been 8 years since I've had a peaceful enough time putting up the tree that I've even had the inkling to get out the camera and photograph this memorable experience. While I enjoy the finished result, the 'putting up the Christmas tree' has not been a fun, sweet time that I've wanted to document.

Until now.

Can you see my smile?

It's pretty big!

To be continued...I know. Don't you just hate that?

Christmas Cupcakes

A few days before Christmas, Robin and my boys made cupcakes for all the kids to decorate. It was great fun for all...the kids worked hard and did a fantastic job!

Alex and her lovely cupcakes

Jacob's cupcakes

And Devon's

And Caleb's

And Abbi's

And we can't leave out Laura's

Clayton and AJ even got to join in on the fun

Mmmmm...as Clayton would say,

"Izza big, BIG cupcake!"