Our summer with Leanna - Part Six

July 21, 2010

Hello all,

I’m sure you’re in shock that it’s been so long since I’ve sent out an update! It’s not because there hasn’t been an update to send…usually when I’m on the computer, Leanna is right by my side watching my every move. And in the evenings when all the kids go to bed I am just too tired to put a complete sentence together. I have been working on this email for a week…

Anyway, things have been mostly good. Still a rough moment here and there, but nothing like what we experienced two weeks ago. This attachment thing is good and hard and lonely and frustrating and wonderful...all in one. I know the worst is not behind us…I know as the day of Leanna’s departure gets closer, she’ll likely begin to detach from us so that maybe it won’t be so hard to leave. I’m not looking forward to that. The detachment or her leaving.

Some of you already know this, but our most pressing prayer request at this time is that Leanna is very undecided about what to do...let us adopt her or stay in Russia. I think she is really worried about leaving her great-grandmother behind. She's 83 and Leanna says she 'lives only for her.' I think she's worried about what will happen to her great-grandmother if she leaves. Please pray that God will lead her in this decision and that she’ll have peace about it. Pray that God is binding Leanna to us and that she feels like she’s part of the family. Pray that she misses us when she returns to Russia. Pray that she receives good counsel before she makes her decision. She is really counting the cost and has asked a few of her friends what she should do. Two of them told her they can't make that decision for her and another told her she should come live in America. She has friends who are glad they’ve been adopted and friends who wish they hadn’t left Russia. She has at least one friend who said ‘no’ to being adopted and is happy with his decision. Leanna also asked her chaperone what she should do, and was told that she should come live with us. We had another of her chaperones for a few hours last Wednesday. She didn’t speak much English, but did say a few times, “Children need families.” It was so nice to hear a pro-family, pro-adoption orphanage caregiver say that. Leanna told me that the days that we stay home and do nothing, the times when she is bored, that's when she misses Russia and thinks she shouldn't come. I reminded her that this is summer and summer is lazy. I told her that when she's here for good, school will take up much of her day and we do participate in several activities during the week. We're not usually 'lazy' like we have been. And once she can read our books, that will help. She enjoys reading. I did notice that last Friday, a stay-at-home ‘boringly’ day, she didn’t complain at all. It was actually a very nice, fun, relaxing day. It was the first day that we really felt like a family…no awkward or uncomfortable moments. It was just natural. And it’s lasted all this time. God is so good.

Pray also that her great-grandmother gives consent for us to adopt her and that she has peace about it. A friend told us about an inexpensive calling card to Russia. We bought one last week and Leanna has called her great-grandmother twice. I think it’s good for Leanna to know she’ll still be able to talk to her. She called on Saturday and apparently the great-grandmother said, ‘yes’ Leanna can come live with us. Leanna said that at first her grandmother was apprehensive at the thought of her not living in Russia anymore. Then she said something about how she doesn’t even know us. Then she asked what Leanna wanted and said Leanna could come live with us if that’s what she wants. I was sitting next to Leanna during the conversation and afterwards when Jon came into the room Leanna excitedly told him, “Babushka say yes!” It took Jon a split second to realize her meaning. I wonder if Leanna saw the tears in Jon’s eyes. I asked Leanna what she wants and she smiled and said she didn’t know. But in her next breathe she talked about when we come to Russia to get her. She talks about that often, but still says she doesn’t know what she wants. Two Sundays ago in church, she wrote her name all over my bulletin…Leanna Evans. It’s like it’s settled in her heart, but her mind keeps going back and forth. I know it will be very hard for her to leave Russia. We went shopping on Saturday and Leanna helped us pick out a gift for her babushka. We’re also going to write her a letter just saying how much we enjoyed having Leanna this summer and we’ll include some pictures. Hopefully that will make Babushka little more comfortable letting her great granddaughter come live on the other side of the world.

Leanna is an amazing girl, as many of you know. We’ve learned that not only does she speak Russian and is learning English quickly, but she also knows a little German, French and Ukraine. She sang a song to us in Ukraine on one of our evening walks. She has a beautiful singing voice. She also told Jon, “I love you” in Ukraine. Her middle name is something like RoMONivna. Very pretty. One day she was telling me about some of her friends who’ve been adopted. We were talking about their Russian names and what their names are now. I asked her about us calling her Leanna and she said she likes us to call her that. She is very playful and has a great sense of humor. We went out for dinner one night with Jon’s parents. She had taken Jon’s keys when we got out of the van. When she wouldn’t give the keys back Jon said, “That’s okay…you can drive home.” She said okay, then looked at me and said, “PRAY!” We all laughed…such a funny girl! It’s been fun to see the different relationships Leanna has with each of the kids. She and Jacob seem to be equals although she does like to try to boss him around. Jacob doesn’t usually give in to her…sometimes it’s okay, sometimes she gets mad and pouty, but she always snaps out of it fairly quickly. We’ve been able to see Leanna’s interaction with two different boys and I can say without a doubt that we will have our hands full. J But I am very glad that we were able to see the difference in how she acted around those boys and how she treats Jacob…like a brother. She calls Caleb her baby and seems to be protective of both him and Abbi. Caleb is our most active child and he and Leanna have gone on several bike rides together and they both like to jump on the trampoline together. It’s been really fun to see Abbi and Leanna together. For the past week or so Leanna has been going into Abbi’s room at bedtime. She sits at the end of Abbi’s bed and they chat in the dark until Jon or I tell them it’s time for sleep. Leanna told Abbi that she’s always wanted a sister. I got up one day to find both girls in Abbi’s room…playing with dolls. I couldn’t believe that Leanna was playing with dolls! At the last New Horizons gathering, Leanna introduced the kids as her brothers and sister. J

Things have also improved GREATLY with Jon. There are still things we’re working on, but Leanna is treating Jon MUCH better than before. She loves to joke around with him, but she is still not very affectionate with Jon. A few nights ago, she almost gave Jon a goodnight hug. Twice. Then on Monday we were at the park and Jon went to put his arm around Leanna. Instead of going the other way like she normally would, she actually leaned in to him. That was a big, yet subtle, moment. The next night she gave him a half hug at bedtime. So, things are getting better every day and we’re celebrating every little improvement. And now Leanna usually walks with Jon and the dog on our evening walks instead of sticking with me and holding my hand. Sometimes just the two of them go on walks and the rest of us stay home.

We now have 11 days left with Leanna. Please pray they are GOOD days.

That’s it for now. I apologize for the length of this update. J

Love,

Amy