I've been following 3 blogs of people who are adopting from Russia. I think they are all adopting from the same city that Leanna is in, but not the same orphanage. They all live about an hour or two from here. I hope I get to meet them soon. I recently became Facebook friends with all 3 of them. I've talked to one of them on the phone. It's funny how adopting children from the same city, country even, can bond you to people you don't even know. And probably never would know if not for the commonality of adoption. Jon has even gotten to 'know' these families. When we have our dinner conversations and 1 of these 3 families has blogged that day, he knows exactly who I'm talking about when I say their name and give him the update. Two of the families are near the end of their adoption journey (and will begin a new chapter) and the other began a few months before us. One of the families gets to bring their son home in 5 days. Yes, I'm keeping track. I sort of feel like Leanna...she keeps track of all her adopted friends and where they go. I'm keeping track of people I don't even know and am living vicariously through them. I rejoice when they post good news. I laugh when they post funny stories about their trips to Russia. Or phone conversations with their child. I wait anxiously with them to hear that things are happening in Russia. Their paperwork gets registered. They get their court date. They get permission from the Russian judge to adopt their child. I appreciate so much these families sharing their stories. I'm learning much from them.
In reading their blogs I can tell that I am not alone in my emotions and that comforts me greatly. From day to day my feelings range from excitement, impatience, fear, doubt, hope, impatience, "what are we thinking," uncertainty, trust, impatience, worry, anxiety, joy and the ever-present what if, what if, what if. I still find it interesting that I'm not worrying about where the money will come from. Maybe I'm being naive. Maybe it should be keeping me up at night.
It's not.
In this area, I just know that God will provide. He's already begun. He hasn't given me any reason NOT to believe He'll provide. Matthew 6:8 keeps weaving itself into my days. Whether it's from something I read or someone posts it on Facebook, for one reason or another it's been continually and repeatedly in front of me. "Your Father knows what you need before you ask Him." Yep. I believe that. I know I talked about Abraham recently and I'm about to again. In our Bible study class we've been in Genesis 22 for weeks. It's amazing how much is packed into one little chapter. In verse 8, Abraham says, "God Himself will provide..." and verse 14 says, "So Abraham called that place The Lord Will Provide. And to this day it is said 'On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.'" On the mountain of the Lord...that's what I feel like I'm facing. A mountain. Like I'm looking up and seeing all these challenges before me. And I know we're in for some challenges. Not just in the process of all the fundraising and paperwork and everything else to bring Leanna home, but once she's actually here. I'm not afraid of the mountain, but I sure do wish it was more like a rolling prairie laced with pretty, fragrant flowers along the way. I have a feeling this mountain is going to be more like a long, steep, jagged, narrow path with cliffs on both sides of me. The kind that makes you breathless in mere moments. The kind where you think, "Just one more hill and then it's got to level out!" The kind that people like my brother would look at and salivate at the thought of conquering it. While I would rather sit at the lodge with a cup of coffee and a good book. I don't have that option this time.
On the mountain of the Lord, it will be provided. Okay then. I'm tying my shoes. I'm getting my gear on. I'm doing some stretching. I'm grabbing my water bottle (of living water, that is). Here we go...
In other news, look at our puzzle! It's so exciting to see it coming together!
It's turned into a 'thankful' puzzle. We're so thankful for each name under each piece. Some days it's overwhelming how many people love us and want to help bring Leanna home. Some of the donations have come from people we don't even know. Some have come from friends we haven't seen or spoken to in 5 years or more. Some have come from children. And a few of them have been given with tears because sponsoring one puzzle piece is a true sacrifice. I know a few of our puzzle piece sponsors are going through financial difficulties right now. I am humbled that they still chose to donate to our adoption fund. Luke 21:1 - 4 has become real to me. Really real.
One more little tidbit...one of the bloggers that I'm following got home last week from her first trip to Russia. She talked about when they were leaving the orphanage. She and her husband left through the cloak room where all the children were taking off their coats after coming inside from playtime. She said all the children ran to them and all began speaking at once. I hope she doesn't mind me sharing this with you...
"Cherub faces staring up at us, all saying “When will I be picked”. Literally, that’s what they were saying. My heart almost broke in 2. Being picked is a very big thing for these children. They’ve seen and experienced other people being picked and they know what it feels like to not be picked. When we left the orphange on Saturday, Nastya S. wrapped her arms tightly around my waist and said, "Please find me a family. I'm going to be left here all alone." So many of her friends have families coming for them. My heart broke for her. Please tell people about her and her desire for a family. Consider hosting her this summer through New Horizons for Children."
